Soul Mate Detox

Nowadays, I'm not sure if I believe in the term "Soul mate" and all that comes with it. I don't believe there's one person meant to be your soul mate. I do believe that maybe a soul mate can be a variety of people, who come into your life to teach you something, or give you something. Whether it's love, a lesson about yourself, or to make you stronger than you were before--something along those lines--they are supposed to enrich your life in some way, change it and mold it. Some soul mates stay, and some leave you.

Let me tell you a story about why....

There's a man that has been in my life sporadically but strongly over the past seven years. And I truly did believe he was my soul mate--the love of my life. It was so very "Carrie and Big" or "Ross and Rachel" in the fact that we just couldn't make it work even though the love was there, but I believed that in the end, we'd finally make it--because we were soul mates, after all.

This past year he came back into my life, and I figured this was it-- it was finally our time to make things work. We were both adults now and had grown in our convictions, and this was the time of our lives to be together. However...just like all tortured love stories....this past Christmas, we decided to end things, again, and this time I believe was the last time---the final goodbye.


My problem now, is the detox. How do I rid my body of one soul mate, to prepare for the next? What is the best and safest way to do it? How do you get to the point where you don't need him anymore?--Where you don't think about him, you don't tear up when you look at a pint of Ben & Jerry's because of all the special memories attached to it?--You don't see a commercial or read a joke and think, woah, he really would have liked this....
What's the best way to do it? Do you cut yourself off, cold turkey, from all things him? Do you throw yourself back into the dating pool and date losers who have no chance of ever meaning to you what he did, just to say your "putting yourself out there?" Do you stay away from sad movies about soulmates, love songs, and never mention his name? Or.... do you think about him often, wish him love and best wishes, and then let it pass? Do you look at the pint of Ben & Jerry's fondly, remembering the time you looked out your dorm room window and saw him running towards you, pint in hand? Do you listen to the songs you loved together, smile, and be thankful that such a special person was in your life, faults and all. I mean, like Garth Brooks says, "I could have missed the pain, but I'd of had to miss the dance.." Do you continue on with your life, knowing that if you were lucky enough to have one soulmate come into your life, the odds of being able to accept another are that much greater?

I think I'll choose the latter, it sounds so much more "zen".